Why Asking for Help is Essential for Leaders

Let’s talk about strength for a moment. We’ve been taught—especially as women—that strength means having all the answers, being the one everyone turns to when problems need solving. But here’s the truth that so many of us discover in the quiet moments between the crises: real strength isn’t about being the solitary hero. It’s about understanding when to take charge and when to reach out for support. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of wisdom and deep self-awareness.

The Old Way of Seeing: Self-Sufficiency as Strength

You may hear a voice telling you that asking for help will make others doubt your abilities. “I should handle this on my own,” it says, convincing you that being a leader means going it alone. But this mindset can harm not just you, but your team as well. By not seeking help, you risk burnout and set a tone that discourages collaboration, ultimately weakening team performance and stifling innovation.

When we isolate ourselves, we limit our solutions to the narrow scope of our own perspective. We cut ourselves off from the beautiful, expansive potential of what could be—if only we had the courage to reach out. This old way of seeing is driven by fear—fear of judgment, fear of appearing weak, fear of losing control. That fear is a heavy burden to carry alone. But we do it anyway, often to the detriment of our teams and, yes, ourselves.

A New Way of Seeing: Interdependence as Strength

But what if we turned that old narrative on its head? What if, instead of seeing independence as our greatest strength, we began to see interdependence as the ultimate power move?

This new way of seeing asks us to embrace vulnerability. To recognize that no one—no matter how brilliant—can have all the answers or all the skills needed to navigate the complex challenges of leadership. What if asking for help wasn’t just okay, but actually the smart thing to do? Imagine what it would be like to foster a culture where collaboration and learning are celebrated, where every voice, including your own, is valued.

“I now understand that embracing interdependence and seeking help from others is not a sign of weakness, but a strategic approach to leveraging the collective strengths of my team, fostering trust, and driving better outcomes.”

In this new light, asking for help isn’t something to be avoided. It’s a proactive step—a way of weaving together the diverse threads of your team’s collective intelligence. It’s how we build trust. It’s how we make better decisions. It’s how we lead with head and heart, and grow, together.

Examples of Asking for Help

Self-Leadership: Picture this – you’re feeling overwhelmed as the weight of a big decision is pressing down on you. Rather than carrying that burden alone, what if you reached out to a mentor or a coach? What if you said, “I’m struggling here; can you help me find clarity?” How powerful would that be?

Relationship Leadership: Maybe you’ve noticed a shift in the team’s dynamic. Trust feels shaky, and the usual camaraderie isn’t there. Instead of brushing it aside to prioritize your long list of tasks, what if you brought it into the open and asked for the team’s help in rebuilding that trust? What a gift that could be – to you and to them.

Process Leadership: Or perhaps you see inefficiencies in the way things are done. It’s tempting to try and fix it all yourself, but what if you didn’t? What if you formed a cross-functional team to dive into the problem together? To ask for their ideas, their expertise? Imagine the possibilities.

Call to Action: Reflect and Act

So here’s my invitation to you: Where are you avoiding asking for help right now? Take a moment to reflect on that part of your leadership where you feel most stuck, most overwhelmed. What fears or beliefs are holding you back from reaching out?

Your next step could be small- a simple conversation, a quick email, a moment of vulnerability with someone you trust. Embrace the strength that comes from interdependence.

By changing the way we see asking for help – from a sign of weakness to a sign of strength – we don’t just become better leaders. We become better people. We open the door to more effective leadership, richer collaboration, and better outcomes.